Future of Arranged Marriages in India- Thoughts to Ponder!!!

Blog by Lakshmi.

What is the future of arranged marriages in India?

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What does the future of arranged marriage look like in India? With a younger generation becoming more and more involved in the decision making process, is the future of arranged marriage something that will be fading away?
With globalization and the internet in our lives, things have changed. People have become aware of the world and the culture of other countries and they are now much more open to the idea of love marriage. With the rise of social media and the changing tide in the country, a lot of people have started questioning an arranged marriage’s relevance in the modern day. In fact, a recent survey suggests that over 90% of the youth today would not be comfortable with an arranged marriage. Why is that? The survey says that the reason why today’s youth would not be comfortable with an arranged marriage is because it leaves no room for love to blossom. The survey has been out for quite a while now and it seems that it has sparked a lot of debate among the Indian youth.

Are arranged marriages really as bad and unacceptable? I don’t think so. Anyway, I’m not here to start a debate on arranged marriages. I’m here to talk about arranged marriages in today’s world and their relevance in the lives of millennials.

What does modern society say?

If arranged marriages are really bad for modern society like the survey suggests, why is there still so much talk about arranged marriages around us? Why is it still so much in favor? Why it is still widely practiced in India?
Well, for starters, it’s a tradition and we all should respect it. It’s not a bad thing. One thing I’ve noticed is that the youth of today is more understanding and open to the concept of arranged marriages. It’s actually pretty thoughtful of your parents to want to make a good match for you and to try and protect you from heartbreak. A lot of my friends are open to the concept of being introduced to a stranger and getting married to him or her. I’ve seen a lot of positive feedback from the people of my generation.
There has been a huge evolution in the process of arranged marriages. There are different and innovative approaches today for groom/bride selection, engagement parties and marriage ceremony. A lot has changed from what an arranged marriage was in our grandmothers’ times. Today, it is more of a mutual decision between families, than an outright arranged marriage.
I’m sure the traditional arranged marriage is still very much alive in India. It still exists in Indian culture and the younger generation are pretty okay with it too.
When people think of arranged marriages, they often think of a marketing gimmick for matrimonial sites. But it is much more than that. An arranged marriage is a serious commitment and it will stay strong in the future, too.
The idea of arranged marriage is as old as time itself. In the Indian subcontinent, they are still a popular practice, and it is only getting more popular with the passage of time.
There is no doubt about the fact that arranged marriages are here to stay…

In conclusion, be it love or arranged marriage, all that matters is the life ahead of the couple. So, as long as you stay together refusing to give up on each other, all marriages will end up being perfect…

Pain- A Poem

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Try…
Experience…
At least once.
Love someone,
To know the pain.
Of existence…
Of longing…
Of loneliness…
Love hard,
To know you.
Your boundaries.
Judgement…
It is not yours.
You live with others.
To write stories.
To rewrite the ones…
Already said many times.
Mistakes create and forget,
To make more mistakes.
Love is poison…
Pain is pure…
You live to enjoy the pain.
Of love and loneliness.
Love an emotion…
Yet to conquer…
Thirst to love always linger.
Pain is like labor pains,
You forget once you find love.
Again to create more pains.
Passionate love quench thirst…
Thirst returns in time…
Wander again to find love.
The pure pain.
In everyone’s life….

Re- Birth – A Poem

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Dear bird, will you come to me with love notes
Where is my love bird to sing my heart notes
Words I noted from my heart with heartbeat rhythm
Tears filled eyes ready to overflow
My songs and my life songs slave in pain
Will you fly in to me as thousand petals
Temptations flare in me alone with out restrictions
All dreams shatter in time with pain
Far away nice breeze move away with out touching me
Body pains with out experiencing calmness
Heart shivers with out any peace in sight
Tear petals slowly caressed my cheeks
Searched all over to find calmness in life
Hoping to feel a breast with milk
To feel again as a baby with no pain
To sleep one more time with out stress
To feel once more that loving touch of mother
Lullaby from neighbor house marked a scar on pain
Tear soaked pillows gave some coolness for burning heart
Fell asleep to see the bird in dreams filled with kisses
Danced to my tunes for me in dreams
Heaven, I felt for a while just to realize
Not my life
Just fantasy we see in social media
Realize people, social media paints only fake scenes
Life, a complex phenomenon
Open your eyes wide and see around you
To realize life is beautiful for you
Tears dry up once you see through
Live your life, not others.
Heart will melt and sooth you in time
Like a mother, nature will embrace you
Lullaby from neighbor house will enhance you
Love bird will fly in as thousand petals
Breeze will touch you again to re birth as human.
Silence around you will become mystical tunes
Start to live again…. Heaven.

If you love my creativity, Please give a chance to this fiction novel full of twists and surprises. Journey of a woman who fought against societal pressures of low caste and upper caste divisions. Her struggles to stay alive. Her fight against injustice…. Enjoy reading.

Letters- A Fading Phenomena

Nostalgic Poems

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Sun shined through windows
Tired eyes yet energetic body
Soon the letter will come from the one
I was waiting for two weeks to read
A few lines only… Yet an emotional roller-coaster
May be a distant relationship thing
These days, no one really knows the feeling
Of holding that letter every two weeks
Yet, the reply from four weeks ago
Knowing the reality the reply of the letter 
I just send will be two weeks wait again
No phone calls
No text messages
No face to face calls
Just a few words filled with emotions
Written in their own handwriting
Some had smudges with tears
Some had smile all over them
Imagine the face when you read
Imagine the sound you hear through words
The feeling not so true to new generations
Patience not known to new generations
Two weeks to convey love is a taboo nowadays
Remember those were the sweet memories we cherish
Those were the true test of love
Ping.. A text got send
Next second no return text
End of the world for new generation
Time to stop, reflect yourself to realize
What is love?
Back in time read those letters
Will bring back the true bonds we created
Sitting in two corners of land
We scribbled with passion to fill our love
In to two little pages or a post card
Send away to wait for four weeks 
Two weeks one way and to get reply
Love get stronger and stronger with longlines
Enjoy the dreams we create while letter in transit
Imagine the emotions when they read the words
The best time of our lives
Letters in transit…

the gone time!!

Poem by Ananya Agarwal

Photo by Ananya Agarwal

Why did you lose me?

Here in earth and heaven

Never will my love reduce for you

The long days or the never ending nights,

The dreams of being with you

Wanting to hear you out

Or rather having the time we used to.

From irritating to gossiping

From fighting to withstanding

Never would I lose your side

For then why did you lose me?

Went on a place I could never talk

Never knew whether you were good enough

Happy without us….

The smile through your eyes,

The care through your words

The shoulder for the tears

Or the back for my fears…

I was in love with your voice

Or the pattern of the noise,

From giggling to screaming

Never would I lose you

For then why did you lose me?

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I miss you as a teddy misses the hugs

Or the stars without the moon

You were mere friend when you were here,

But your mere absence has made me numb.

For why does it happen?

Why did u just had to lose me?

Today as I know, late but realized

No amount of time I was with you

Did I ever re-read those memories

Cherish the moments with you;

Cauz weren’t we too busy

Running for the new and not stopping afar.

Every day gives a lesson

Your departure gave me a life lesson,

The short time was enough for us,

For you could just walk away,

Pondering me with a question

Why did you lose me?

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All I could know now

So let us all focus on the present

Cauz today is always a gift

For the future always remains a mystery.

One never knows or could live…

Though I am in love with your voice

Or the pattern of your noise

The shoulder for my tears

the back for my fears…

Choose your hardships- A valid lesson to practice

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Happiness and Sadness. Two sides of a coin. I read somewhere today. Choose your hardships. The message is so beautiful. I felt compelled to write in my own way. What I learned from it. I am sharing here. Beauty of words can move you and forces you to change the way how you think. Today the message forced me to think in a different angle. More positive. I am glad I have this medium of blogging to let others know that it can change us. We need to change.

Recently I watched a documentary. I have to say this; I am not at all interested in documentary types or real life violence type. If I watch something terrible, it haunts me for a long period. Especially when I drive. My thoughts linger and I feel so bad. I often put myself in the victim’s shoes. This really sparks me to say a few things here. If those shows affect me negatively how much a person with those undesirable traits or mental health will get influenced? Why we have high viewership for these documentaries or shows? I urge everyone to watch shows like Friends, etc. Where you take your mind off from real life for a one hour or two. Laugh it out, people. Life is so short and we have many issues around us. Work, Family, Kids. We are surrounded by many challenges. When we have free time, why we watch these kinds of shows and put our mind in to more misery? I really don’t get it.

The show I am talking above is about a father taking his wife and his children’s life. Whatever reason he had, I am not bothered. But stuck with me is those kids faces and their last questions to their dad. Broke my heart and it still pains a lot. I still question myself, why I sat there and finished that documentary. Hope those kids are in a beautiful place up above enjoying the beauty of this world with out hardships.

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Earlier I said, Choose your hardships, why in a what sense.

Marriage and work you put to cherish that relationship is hard. Getting divorce and going through that order is hard. Which hardship you will chose? Nothing is easy. It is up to us which hardship we should choose. Depression and living with that is hard. Going out and get help to come out of depression is hard. Which one you will chose? Buying a home and maintaining that home is hard. Living without a home and stay in uncertain is hard. Which hardship you will chose? Paying mortgage is hard. Paying rent is hard. Which hardship will you choose?

I laid out some examples only. But anything you want to achieve is hard and not having that is also hard. So why don’t you chose the hardship you want to earn and run with it. Friends, we can choose our hardships ourselves and we sure can get the dreams fulfilled. Spread only positive energy and life out there. Of course there is trouble and destructive energy there. Don’t focus on it. Watch movies, shows etc which gives you happiness to your mind. Refresh yourself and go back to your hardships. Soon those hardships will move out of your way, because the energy you radiate will outlast those hardships.

Thank you guys. Hope you will choose the right hardships from now on. Support my book if you love reading.

Life can be Foggy at times…

Foggy day VANCOUVER

Day before, I was driving to work. I haven’t seen that much fog in my entire time here at Vancouver. I took a few pictures on my way (of course not while driving. LOL). My thoughts went around it and found a beautiful positive twist to it. I always love when I get positive vibes. If I can find something to relate or help others through my random thoughts. I will. Here it goes.

I cannot see much in front of me when I was driving. I could hardly see a few meters. Did I stop driving? Did I get scared and parked the car? No. What I saw is when I drive slowly forward, the images get clearer and clearer. I could see. The point is, Same as our lives. We all had our bad days. If we stop pushing forward, we will stay in our status quo. We cannot improve ourselves. Same as future, we cannot see, but what we can see is right now. So if this “right now” is clear to you, why you want to worry about the future?

“Fogg about our FUTURE will clear by itself if we move forward with clear sight of NOW” – Ajay Nair

I am going to quote this above sentence now and then. For me, it gives us a message. Nature itself showed us the message for a long period. As usual, we never saw the message, or we failed to interpret the nature’s signals. Foggy days are a perfect example. Never stall your life worrying about future or past. Just like Fogg clears up, as we move forward driving, same as our life and future will visualize.

The pictures I took, I will share here. The images are not clear due to Fogg, but what you can see can be considered as “NOW”. It is very clear and beautiful too. It gives us an obvious interpretation. What is behind the Fogg, is our future. Walk with head held high, future will come in front of you clearer. I love it and I hope I am sharing this to some of you who may love it too.

Thanks for reading. If you agree, please share, read my books, blogs and poems. Love you all. Remember, Fogg is not here to stay…Stop fogging up your mind with thoughts related to future and see clear what is NOW.

Gandhi Jayanti- October 2

MAHATMA GANDHI

Born as an Indian, one can never forget this date. Can we?

In our blood, brain and cells, October 2 etched on us. We die with this date on our hearts too. Proud to be Indian, just because this personality was born in India. Many of us learned a lot about his teachings during our school days. The man, the leader, the guru and ofcourse most fierceful freedom fighter. His biggest weapon is “Ahimsa”

Many leaders followed his teachings and messages. Dr. Martin Luther King and Dr. Nelson Mandela to name a few among them. Today also many influencers take his teachings and interpretation to reach masses. Remember, he did this with no social media help. He did this by walking in to masses. I would like to remember Terry Fox here. He did it by himself to bring change. His legacy still follows many years of him leaving us.

Mahatma Gandhi inspired people by leading them with what he preached always. He never leads them from behind. He was there, walking with them. I still remember the screenings of his footages we have from freedom fighting days. Those black and white fast motion movies definitely moved our hearts.

I do not know whether in our lifetime another Mahatma will come in our lives. I know this much, Mahatma had given us a lot for our generation and many more generations to come. His teachings are still relevant and will not get outdated, regardless of what century we are in. How many of us can say this with confidence, the lessons we give to our children will be relevant for a different century. I highly doubt that.

This October 2nd we are celebrating Mahatma Gandhi’s 151st birth anniversary. During this pandemic, I want to say, believe in ourselves. We will come out of it. Gandhi believed in Ahimsa, and he knew that is the only weapon he needed to get freedom for India. He believed, and he reached masses with this message. Today, politicians are struggling to reach masses with a simple message like “Wash your hands, Wear masks”. I am not comparing politicians to Mahatma Gandhi. I am just saying he was divine. The most important teaching he gave us and influenced me is

“Ahimsa is the highest duty. Even if we cannot practice it in full, we must try to understand its spirit and refrain as far as possible from violence”

He is our superhero for our nation. We lovingly call him Bappu. Happy Birthday dear Bappu. You are our father and will be always in our hearts as our Nations Father. Salute.

Reset- A Natural Phenomenon

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Now 8 months in to 2020. Is world trying to reset here? I wonder sometimes. I feel like a standstill everywhere. I want to think positive here. Why we are hearing so much bad news these days? I put together a few pointers here.

1) As a human being we took granted many things nature has provided to us.

2) We felt we are above everything. We developed this arrogance of saying we have knowledge.

3) We left our humbleness and abuse nature for our short-term gain/ happiness.

I can talk over and over on this topic. However, my point here is human beings are not anymore humans. They slowly have become someone who lost their respect for nature and its gifts. Somehow this entitlement feeling took over us. We behaved like we created all this. We created some perishable items and felt like supreme power. We ignored what nature had stored for us, which is not at all perishable. We ruined it by what we call “Life style or Modernization”

Think back, our forefathers they worked hard on land and lived on what the land provided to them. They never tried to destroy the land. They preserved the land for the future, which is what we got as a gift from them. Now what are we going to give our kids. RUINED and UNWORTHY land. I would like to call, We raped mother nature already so much that it has started now to retaliate.

Last few months from march, it gives us a shock treatment by nature. You call it china virus, or factory produced virus. Regardless, nature is taking a U turn here. No doubt. We see clear skies and clear water. Just simple 5 months, we already see this much difference, you can imagine how powerful this nature is.

Take all the incidents world all over, movement to positive is happening. BLM, Women empowerment, Me too, all leads to reset. I am glad to see people are finally coming together to do something for their kids meaningful. Once we worshipped water, fire and air. Now we don’t even give any value to these three necessities. We pollute nature as if we own these and we create these. Stop making fun of those individuals who pray to these elements. They understand the importance of those fundamental key things. These three keep us alive. I came from a part of the world where water is someday a luxury. I know the value of it. We had gone days without water. We also had gone days with the flood. I know the importance of taking care of nature. The only way we can give a healthy life to our future generation.

So friends, stop abusing the nature. Do what you can to help the nature.

My Next projects Cover Reveal

Hi literary lovers. I am very excited today to finally reveal my cover designs for projects which are lined up for release in the coming months. The dates are not solid yet. But I will try my best to get this out for you all to read by the month I have outlined below.

Cutie Fox went to fiji

This is going to be a fun book for kids aged between 3 to 8 years old. Sequel series of Cutie Fox stories. This time, Cutie Fox and family are going to Fiji to attend his cousin’s wedding. What happens there and his experiences will take any child explore their curiosity. Story has many positive messages and will have sight words. (Aiming to release by Sept or Oct 2020)

COok with no rules

“Recipes and tips to spice up your boring wraps” The tag line says it all. Book is to help and create healthy wraps with Indian flavor to it. Target to motivate younger generation to eat healthy with more vegetables to their diet. This wrap fillers are all cooked, no raw vegetable. Packed with flavors to explore.( Aiming to release Dec 2020)

Trust me- One Woman two lives

Torn by many society practices, Lakshmi landed in to safe hands of Kelu. Many years later trouble looms around her past. Daughters both suffers through the system of untouchable anarchy. Losing her mother and sister in one day, Bhavani is all set for revenge. Can she step up to her brother in law? Trust Me- One Woman Two Lives is an emotional roller coaster with many lives entangled in danger and true blood relationships. (Aiming to release March 2021)

Please do support my current books on sale. Droplets, Cutie Fox went to town and Celestial Poems. I will keep bringing you more books in the coming years as I have many other projects in my mind. I need support as an encouragement. Thank you all.